INCREDIBLE LIES TODAY ¦ STILL BOLLOCKS TOMORROW





IN THIS ISSUE:

day the earth got spanked

"Live in Peace, or be Spanked..."

DAY THE EARTH GOT SPANKED

ALIENS GIVE CHILLING WARNING TO MANKIND! IS IT HUMANITY'S FATE TO BE SPANKED INTO SUBMISSION BY SPACEMEN? DESPITE FEARS OF WORLD LEADERS, PROMISE OF PROPER DISCIPLINE WELCOMED IN MANY QUARTERS!

Sex in Space

"He's Attempting Re-Entry..."

SEX IN SPACE

NASA CLAIM TO HAVE ACHIEVED FIRST ZERO-GRAVITY ERECTION SPARKS NEW SPACE RACE! RUSSIAN AND AMERICAN SPACE AGENCIES VIE TO LAUNCH ADULT FILM PRODUCTION MODULE FOR INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION!

"...BEFORE SURVEILLANCE CAMERAS CAME ALONG PEOPLE COULD LEAD THEIR ENTIRE LIVES WITHOUT BEING NOTICED - IT WAS IF THEY HAD NEVER EXISTED!"

A LIFE IN PICTURES

MAN BELIEVES LIFE ONLY VALIDATED WHEN CAUGHT ON CAMERA, USES SURVEILLANCE TECHNOLOGY TO STAR IN FILM OF OWN LIFE!


ALSO INSIDE:


EDITORIAL-


HAVING IT LARGE!


SLEAZE DIARY-


SCRAPING ALONG THE BOTTOM!


TOTAL BOLLOCKS!


MORE AMAZING GOSSIP FROM LITTLE MISS STRANGE!


SLEAZEBAG -


ALIENS PULLED MY PLONKER! BIZARRE NOCTURNAL INTRUSIONS PROBED IN YOUR LETTERS!



TOP TRASH CLASSICS REVIEWED:

FUELLING THE PROTESTS


FUEL PRICE PROTESTERS FORCED TO CANCEL DEMONSTRATION AS RIOTERS UNABLE TO AFFORD PETROL FOR MOLOTOV COCKTAILS!

SECRET DIARY OF A STREET WALKER


COULD SENSATIONAL NEW BOOK PUT BRITAIN'S PERSONAL SERVICES INDUSTRY AT RISK?

THE BIG POLITICAL SELL OUT

FAILING LABOUR PARTY FACES HAVING PRIVATE COMPANY BROUGHT IN TO RUN AFFAIRS! BRANSON'S VIRGIN GROUP FAVOURITES FOR TAKEOVER AS MPS FEAR JOB LOSSES AND ASSET-STRIPPING!

MORE STORIES FROM THE SLEAZE:

SEX AND VIOLENCE

MINISTER HELD HOSTAGE IN S&M DUNGEON AND MPs PELTED WITH DILDOS AS MILITANT FETISHISTS STORM PARLIAMENT IN PROTEST AT NEW LAWS BANNING VIOLENT PORN!


ALL AMERICAN GIGOLO

SHOCK CLAIMS THAT HILARY CLINTON'S CAMPAIGN FUNDED BY HUSBAND'S IMMORAL EARNINGS! DID HILARY PIMP BILL OUT AS MALE ESCORT FOR LONELY WIDOWS TO RAISE FUNDS?

SWEET LOVE

IS AMERICA'S BEEKEEPING INDUSTRY UNDER THREAT FROM UNDER ENDOWED CELEBRITIES SEEKING PENIS ENLARGEMENTS?


GORDON BROWN, GOING DOWN?

PRIME MINISTER ACCUSED OF BUYING VOTES WITH SEXUAL FAVOURS! DID GORDON BROWN WIN VITAL TERROR VOTE BY OFFERING PROSTITUTES AND PORN TO REBEL BACK BENCHERS?

THE AWARDS ON TERROR

INTERNATIONAL TERRORISM AWARDS ROCKED BY ALLEGATIONS OF VOTE-RIGGING! NON-ISLAMIC TERROR GROUPS THREATEN BOYCOTT!


LONDON LOCK DOWN

BORIS JOHNSON REVEALS PLANS TO TURN LONDON'S SINK ESTATES INTO 'GATED COMMUNITIES'! LOCAL POPULATIONS TO BE SEGREGATED BEHIND BARBED WIRE FENCES - 'FOR OWN SAFETY'!

FROM THE ARCHIVE:

SUBURBAN SEX MACHINES

INCREDIBLE SHAGGING MACHINES MADE IN SUBURBAN GARAGE GIVE WOMEN SUPERHUMAN SATISFACTION! DESIGNER PROFILED!

AUTOMOTIVE EROTICISM!

CARNAGE ON BRITAIN'S ROADS AS RECKLESS THRILL SEEKERS WHACK OFF BEHIND THE WHEEL!

FROM BEHIND


GENTLEMEN BUGGERED IN THE STREET AS MYSTERY ASSAILANT TERRORISES BRITAIN! WHO IS THE PHANTOM BUGGERER - FREEMASON, ROYALTY OR WISHFUL THINKING?

WARNING:


THIS PUBLICATION CONTAINS MATERIAL SOME MAY FIND OFFENSIVE. ALL CHARACTERS MENTIONED IN “THE SLEAZE” ARE ENTIRELY FICTIONAL AND ANY RESEMBLANCE TO REAL PERSONS LIVING OR DEAD IS PURELY COINCIDENTAL. "THE SLEAZE", ITS CONTENTS, LAYOUT AND LOGO ARE ALL COPYRIGHTED AND UNAUTHORISED REPRODUCTION IS FORBIDDEN. STORIES AND ARTICLES CONTAINED IN "THE SLEAZE" ARE COPYRIGHT TO BOTH THIS PUBLICATION AND THE ORIGINAL AUTHORS AND SHOULD NOT BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE PERMISSION OF "THE SLEAZE" AND/OR THE ORIGINAL AUTHORS.